Developing Your Emotional Intuition with the TLL Method
By Tami Lancut Leibovitz
The TLL Method deals with developing and building the toolset for proper personal conduct in social or business environments. The method focuses on developing emotional intuition and is based on the three layers of human image: physical impressions, verbal and non-verbal communication, and day-to-day behaviors. These three elements are fundamentally intertwined and are the basis of the method developed by Tami Lancut Leibovitz.
At its core lies the assumption that basic human insight is a tool for simple, reliable, and powerful inter-personal communication anywhere on the planet where humans reside. In fact – understanding the importance of self, inter-personal, and environmental awareness is what improves our social skills.
According to the TLL Method, improving any one of these foundations will undoubtedly lead to the improvement of the others and to achieving better results in any social situation – social, business, or otherwise. In order to achieve this, the TLL Method focuses on locating, polishing, and refining the social skills, abilities, and traits that are inherent in each and every one of us – thus providing the “finishing touch” required from us in order to make every interaction a pleasant, fruitful one.
The TLL Method grants every individual (young or old) and every organization (small or large) the strategic leverage to gaining the advantage needed to make you or your organization stand out.
The 12 Principles of the TLL Method
By Tami Lancut Leibovitz
“We’re All Different” – Every person their own unique personality traits, different areas of interest, background, education, natural talents, ambitions, fears, and passions – all natural social resources, embedded in each of us. Due to the differences between each and every one of us, a rigid behavioral framework cannot be established and used before taking into account the human component. This principle is fundamental to the TLL Method.
“Turning Your Resources into Assets” – Crude oil is refined into fuel. Diamonds polished to perfection. Like the natural resources of our world, our own human natural resources – body language, voice control, facial expressions, and natural talents – can be refined, polished, and turned into precious assets which will allow you to reach far in any business or casual environment.
“Human Orbits” – The Moon orbits around the Earth. The Earth orbits around the Sun. You too are surrounded and orbited by different worlds – other human beings, each as complicated and intricate as yourself. Understanding your fellow man – including their ambitions and motives – will aid you in achieving your own.
“Universal Language": Communication between Worlds – Proper communication between you and those around you is essential to avoiding unnecessary conflict. Beyond verbal communication, this universal language is made up of several layers:
Non-Verbal Communication – Researches show that above 90% of what we perceive from one another during conversation strives from non-verbal communication (7% verbal, 38% speaking style, 55% non-verbal).
The Behavioral, Politeness, and Customs Codes – Knowing the different codes for proper conduct in workplace, business, or social environments. In society, we address people in part due to their age and status, while in a workplace environment we address people in part due to their title and its place in the company hierarchy. Proper behavior in these situations changes between cultures, countries, and organizations.
“Find Your Personal Edge” – Turn your human weakness into an advantage. Researches show that every human action is based on 90% emotion and only 10% rational thinking. Properly heeding this fact can you lead you to developing a better attitude towards people, to neutralize objections, and to achieve better outcomes from every social, business, or any other type of interaction.
“Politeness Has Your Back” – If the world around us was a system of interconnected roads, politeness would be the rules of that road: a system based on common sense which explains when we must give the right of way, defines the speed limit, and outlines how we must signal other drivers of our intent. Politeness helps avoid “social accidents”, and allows you to reach your destination quickly and in one piece.
“The Human Family” –Mutual respect, restraint, compassion, and patience – these are not just the foundation stones of a healthy family, but also serve as the values fundamental to any civil social culture. Choosing to embrace these values will advocate your peers to follow suit and will nudge all of us closer to a society based on responsible behavior, politeness, and etiquette.
“Every Interaction is also a Presentation” – Every verbal interaction you have – whether it be work-related, with friends, or a lecture in front of students – is measured and judged, including the messages you convey, and is done whether the participants are aware of this or not.
“Every Person Has a Name” – Your name is one of your most important assets. Your name functions as your brand, and is how you are recognized and remembered. When you introduce yourself by your full name, you are no longer one of many – but a unique individual. Like yourself, those around you expect their name to be remembered – and that you address them as such. When you do so, you cut through the cloud of anonymity and convey a feeling of interest and respect.
“Awareness Avoids Mistakes” – Self-awareness is made up of layers. First, you must know yourself: your appearance, voice, body language, and dialect all shape how you are perceived. Second, you must be aware of your surrounding: business, family, and social events all require from you to employ the proper etiquette for the situation. Thirdly, inter-personal awareness: who is the person standing in front of you? What drives them? What are their motives? What gives them pleasure? What deters them? Staying aware, both of your surroundings and yourself, will make the quest for your intended outcome easier, whatever that outcome may be.
“Life is not a Movie” – Life is full of drama, comedy, and tragedy – but unlike Hollywood, the script is never known beforehand. This is why the TLL Method doesn’t deal in rigid, unrelenting rules – but in flexible principles, which are adaptable to the dynamic situations presented to us by life.
“Practice Makes Perfect” – An athlete that wishes to increase his chances of success will memorize the rules of their sport of choice, and will familiarize themselves as much as possible with their enemies and teammates. Likewise, he will need to know his strengths and weaknesses – and practice as hard as he can to improve upon them. This idea is fundamental to the TLL Method, but we mustn’t forget – in life, such as in sports, it is important to win – but its more important to enjoy yourself.
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