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Yom Kippur etiquette, greetings and introduction

Tami Lancut Leibovitz

Yom Kippur, also known as the Day of Atonement is considered a staple Jewish holiday and a high holy day. The first High Holy Day is Rosh Hashanah, the first day of the year, The Jewish New Year, celebrated on the first month of the Jewish Calendar- Tishrei. Ten days after, the 10th of Tishrei, is the day we celebrate Yom Kippur, a day that is all about reconciliation and forgiveness, the day where the Jewish people believe god decides upon destiny. It also the day to make peace with your family, friends and ask for forgiveness from everyone you may have hurt this year. It is considered a day of sadness and remorse, a day with a cloud of melancholy, while each person is supposed to tend to his thoughts about remorse and his actions throughout the year.

Yom Kippur is divided into 3 parts:

Teshuva is a beautiful and highly important part of Yom Kippur, and it means repentance, asking for forgiveness for the mistakes that were committed in the last year.

What is interesting is that asking for remorse through fast and prayer can only be seen when it’s between god and the person. In order for another person to forgive you, you have to make sure you ask them for forgiveness so you can start your New Jewish year with hope and forgiveness in your heart. Making an effort to reconcile takes us to the etiquette subject,

How to say “I am sorry” to friends and family and actually mean it? Here’s a couple of golden rules:

For more about saying “I am Sorry” in work and family environment, visit my latest blog post: http://bit.ly/YomKippur2015

Praying in Yom Kippur is not like praying in any other day, it’s a very long praying session, the longest in the whole year. The prayers opens with the important “Kol Nidrei” prayer – in Hebrew it means “All Vows”- asking for forgiveness for all the sins committed against god.

With that being said, it’s important to realize the Jewish concept of sin is not the Christian concept of sin. Rather, it’s the kind of everyday offenses like hurting our loved ones, being careless to ourselves and putting ourselves down and cursing. The translation of the prayer will help understand it better:

“For the sin that we have committed under stress or through choice;
For the sin that we have committed in stubbornness or in error;
For the sin that we have committed in the evil meditations of the heart;
For the sin that we have committed by word of mouth;
For the sin that we have committed through abuse of power;
For the sin that we have committed by exploitation of neighbors;
For all these sins, O God of forgiveness, bear with us, pardon us, forgive us!”

Fasting is the most known holiday custom. The fast of Yom Kippur is the only fast that is discussed directly upon in the Torah, the Jewish original books, commanding the Jewish people to avoid consumption of liquids and food on that day. Also, is prohibited to turn on any electrical appliances, write or use scissors, bath or brush your teeth, engage in sexual activity and wear leather shoes or clothes. The vegans and vegetarians would love the reasoning behind the non-leather rule: it comes from the absurd of wearing the skin of a slaughtered animal while asking God for mercy and forgiveness.

People embrace the fast often in order to truly feel the forgiveness and to take time to do nothing but dive into the tranquility of a deep inner conversation.

Yom Kippur greeting etiquette

The proper greeting for Yom Kippur is to wish your Jewish friends an "Easy Fast" on Yom Kippur, or in Hebrew "Tzom Kal."  After the fast is over, you can wish "G'mar Hatimah Tovah" in Hebrew, meaning: "May your fate will be sealed for a Good Year in the Book of Life”. Also, because it is still the days after the Jewish New Year and the holiday season, you can also greet with a "Happy New Year" or "Shana Tovah" after and before on Yom Kippur.

I always seek to learn more about cultures and traditions and it was my pleasure to share the tales of a Jewish holiday with you, my readers, especially when it’s a holiday that is widely celebrated in Israel. If you want to know more about the etiquette language of business and society in different cultures and countries, please visit my website to enjoy a variety blog posts and articles in the subject.

Tzom Kal to everyone!